I’m feeling something for the first time since I was 14/15 - excitement about writing a potential story. In the time since I woke up this morning, I have realized that at that point in my life, I was the most creative I had ever been. I was depressed, lonely, and as the cliché goes, I was a motherfucking visionary.
But there’s one caveat that went largely unnoticed for years. I culminated this energy in the most mature and non-embarrassing of ways: I played The Sims and made them act out stories for me, taking pictures and writing these stories through lengthy captions. What I wrote was received well by the twenty other 14 year-olds who probably read them. The best part was that the readers were complete strangers, which is truly fueling.
At the time, I was reading a lot of these types of stories online, which were similar to today’s fan fiction vibe. This is another testament to the idea that in order to tap into whatever story you’re harboring unconsciously, you must read the work of others… At least that works really damn well for me.
Anyway, I interpreted the dominating genre of the community to be young adult, which was perfect for that time in my life. The genre gets a bad rap, at least in my own mind, probably because at the time, I hated teenagers, though I have developed an empathy for them now. Writing for teenagers may seem almost pointless because of how positively shitty their priorities tend to be, but I also believe categorizing readers by age to be stupid. Writing is writing, get from it what you want. Who cares how old or mature you are. Read what I have to say, and hey, that is a really fucking nice thing of you to do.
Back to the actual ridiculously lame thing I just admitted - The big problem with using sims to act out stories is that I was not held responsible for their physical descriptions. Now that I have a degree, I’ve supposedly lived a little, and am (also supposedly) a shining beam of potential, I should be held responsible for such literary essentials. That being said, I don’t really know what the fuck I’m going to do with this idea I am excited about, character description-wise. It’ll probably be really awful, but here’s hoping that turns into a trackable progression. For now, it’s all half-asleep scribbles in a journal I’ve left largely untouched for a long time.
BUT. It’s 12:30 now, and I still like it. I’m also thinking it’s an alcohol-friendly idea. As in, I can drink good wine, write the character without losing my focus, and she’ll even be enhanced by this perk. Ew, yeah, I’m going to write about a girl.
To my sixteen year-old self, here is your personal You Shouldn’t Have Done That List:
Don’t start driving, don’t work, don’t make friends, don’t make a GODDAMN FACEBOOK, and don’t be happy.
However, here’s hoping you wake up one day when you’re 22, realizing there’s value in experiences while both not writing and writing badly. And as for your creativity, you’ll realize it never left.